Have you ever felt like you are at the wrong place? And no matter where you go this feeling never goes away. I feel like this every day and days like yesterday and the day before are here to remind me of that. Whenever I go out there will always be someone who doesn’t like something and complains all the time. There is always someone who is ready to argue. There is always someone who is ready to fight. I don’t belong here. This is not good for my mental health and everyday turns into another day I just need to ‘survive’. There is way too much negative energy and it doesn’t matter how hard you try to resist it at some point it gets to you. Whatever I do, I still don’t feel like I belong here. Yes, I do have friends and family here, but I feel like I am going to get better if I go somewhere else. Sometimes I feel sad without a reason and it feels like something is missing. Maybe if I wasn’t here I won’t feel sad without a reason.It doesn’t matter what I do I feel like it is never enough.
I want to go somewhere where people smile without a reason and it’s not strange to the others. Where people actually help each other. In a place where people appreciate the little things you do for them. A place where there will be mostly positive energy and you can talk to people without getting scared that they’ll shut you out.
A place where there will be nothing missing and maybe finally I can feel whole again.